How to Live: A Search for Wisdom from Old People (While They Are Still on This Earth)

Very well done. The best part was about his no nonsense mother. Kudos for his candor and humor. He's pretty wise himself.

I especially enjoyed reading about Henry's mom, and hope that I can be just like her. I am 53 now and it is very interesting to see how many older people can be very active and useful and how others let themselves wither away when they can, in fact, help themselves and lead a productive, independent life. I do believe the longer you are on this earth, the more experience and insight you have. I am grateful to Henry for sharing his stories with us!!!

This book was very refreshing in it's depiction of people of varied ages, many of them now old. There are no magic clues to the secrets of life in it; but it does show the thread of humanness that starts in youth and stays with a person through all phases of life. It was easier to recognize the person that was highlighted as someone I could relate my experiences to-without the separation of looking at them through the wrinkles or infirmities. I liked it so much I bought a copy to lend out to friends of all ages who could use a broader perspective to their current situation.

Of course if you're after a serious academic study then off you must trot for 'Where Shall Wisdom Be Found?' by Mr Harold Bloom. Personally I gave up reading that stuff when I left university and don't intend to resume till I retire, if then. This is much better, my favourite type of non-fiction - a charming and witty narrator takes me on a tour of a serious subject - both funny and enlightening. Henry Alford carries one effortlessly along without skimping on the corners but without getting so serious that my attention wanders off during the morning commute. Such an sympathetic eye for detail. Mr Bloom and his wife engraved on a mug - the importance of nice bedlinen and what is revealed about a marriage by the changing of a light fitting. The author has a kind of wicked curiosity which is quite irresistible, but he's thoughtful too - more than generous to his subjects and he comes to some useful and pleasing conclusions. I really recommend this book - whatever your age. (Nice 3-piece binding too. More publishers should do that.)

A more accurate title for this book would be "Growing Old Gracefully", as it's obvious that the question Alford is really interested in is "How should we come to terms with our own mortality?" He decides the best way to find out is to ask a bunch of elderly people, then try to distil key life lessons from the resulting conversations. Framing this process as a "search for wisdom" doesn't help particularly, and occasionally causes him to get sidetracked into some fairly unproductive academic discussions. It's not surprising that encouraging people to talk about their own lives works far better than asking them about "wisdom" in the abstract, an approach which, predictably, yields mostly just bland generalities. As a general rule, his success is inversely proportional to the fame of the interviewee. Conversations with Harold Bloom* and Edward Albee lead to unhelpful pseudo-profundities like "wisdom is a perfection that can either absorb or destroy us", and pointless exchanges about the dictionary definition of "wisdom". A series of meetings with actress Sylvia Miles reveal little more than her apparently bottomless self-infatuation. The most interesting thing that is gleaned from self-styled guru Ram Dass's pontification on "wisdom" and "spirituality" is his admission that he doesn't plan to attend his own brother's funeral. This, quite rightly, bothers Alford, though he later suggests that Dass is redeemed by the calm acceptance he displays in the aftermath of a disabling stroke. It's unclear whether this reflects Alford's innate generosity of spirit, or an unwillingness to admit to himself how worthless his pilgrimage to meet with Dass has been. Sandra Tsing Loh has already written more about her eccentric father than anyone might possibly want to know, so Alford's decision to include further anecdotes about Mr Loh's dumpster-diving and public urination is baffling. * I should add that the most memorable response Alford elicits, in an otherwise fairly ho-hum interview with Bloom, is in answer to the simple question "What have you gained with age?" Bloom: "A healthier respect and affection for my wife than I used to have..." (smiles) "Next May will be our fiftieth anniversary". Somehow that moment of sweetness makes one forgive Professor Bloom many of his more pompous utterances over the years. Fortunately for Alford, and for the reader, his conversations with less well-known senior citizens are more rewarding. The best chapters of this book are those in which Alford describes meetings with `ordinary' senior citizens: Charlotte Prozan, a San Francisco psychotherapist he met on a cruise organized by The Nation; Althea Washington, a 75-year old retired schoolteacher who lost her husband and her house in Hurricane Katrina; Setsuko Nishi, 86-year old professor emerita of sociology at Brooklyn College and CUNY; Doris Haddock (aka Granny D), who staged a 3000-mile walk across America in support of campaign finance reform back in 1999, when she was sti