Lesbian Step Families: An Ethnography of Love explores five lesbian step families'definitions of the step parent role and how they accomplish parenting tasks, cope with homophobia, and define and interpret their experiences. An intensive feminist qualitative study, the book offers guidelines for counselors and lesbian step families for creating healthy, functioning family structures and environments. It is the first book to concentrate exclusively on lesbian step families rather than on lesbian mothering in general. In Lesbian Step Families: An Ethnography of Love, you'll explore in detail the different kinds of step relationships that are developed and what factors may lead to the different types of step mothering in lesbian step families. The book helps you understand these relationships and parent roles through in-depth discussions of: how a step mother and legal mother who live together negotiate and organize parenting and homemaking tasks how members of lesbian step families define and create the step mother role strategies family members use to define and cope with oppression how sexism is transmitted within the family and how mothering may limit and/or contribute to female liberation the opinions and viewpoints of the children of these families The findings in Lesbian Step Families: An Ethnography of Love challenge traditional views of mothering and fathering as gender and biologically based activities; they indicate that lesbian step families model gender flexibility and that the mothers and step mothers share parenting--both traditional mothering and fathering--tasks. This allows the biological mother some freedom from motherhood as well as support in it. With insight such as this, you will be prepared to help a client, a loved one, or yourself develop and maintain healthy family relationships.
Very helpful perspectives for those of us struggling to come together as lesbian couples where one or both partners have kids. Five different family structures are examined - each with their own perspective on the role of each parent plays in lesbian step families. Gave great perspective on what it's like for the non-biological mom/girlfriend to be in a parenting situation with the birthmom. In a step-family where straight people re-marry, the "step-mom" is a mother without the biological mom living right there in the same household! These dynamics can be tricky and this book gives good insight into how different families navigate the uniqueness. We don't have to reinvent the wheel alone - this book connects our struggles by showing us how others are tackling the same parenting issues, roles, titles - whether it's 2 moms parenting equally, the birthmom who weighs in more on parenting issues with her female partner in a supportive role, or the female partner as more of the "dad" figure in the relationship. Do we choose to live together or separate w/ the kids? Do we come out at the kids schools? How do we parent older children who are struggling with their parents divorce and mom's lesbianism? These issues and more - find what resonates with you. For me, just knowing how other people are doing it gives me the info I need to create my own lesbian step-family in a way that works for us.
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