If a mountain man felt compelled to dance, how would he do it? If koala bears could talk, what would they say? And what's the right pickup line, if you're a necrophiliac? (Maybe "I'm pretty sure I'm not going to get you pregnant.") In the throes of debates like these, we're lucky to have the learned people of McSweeney's Internet Tendency, America's best low-budget humor website, and their edifying work. From their best-looking writers comes this collection of over three hundred lists, including... "Signs Your Unicorn Is Cheating on You.""Errors in Communication Between My Hairdresser and Me, in the Form of What I Said and What He Heard""Things This City Was Built On, Besides Rock 'n' Roll""Things This One Girl Sitting Near Me in a Movie Theater Said Out Loud When One of the Characters Was Shown Pulling Into a Gas Station""Future Winners of the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest""Adjectives Rarely Used by Wine Tasters""The Collected Apologies of Lawrence H. Summers, President of Harvard""Exactly What I Mean When I Say My Ex-Girlfriend Kristin and I 'Wanted Different Things from Life'"And much, much more...
Think Every Agatha Christie Novel, Only With Squirrels
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 14 years ago
"Mountain Man Dance Moves" is the single volume of all my volumes that I refer to most frequently for lists of unicorn data. From the editors at McSweeney's this book of lists is supremely useful in daily life, and it should be part of every family's emergency survival kit. The lists cover a variety of topics, and contain some surprising information. For your book evaluation convenience I have listed some of the most useful data below. In the list "Actual English Names Chosen by our Korean ESL Students in Suzhou, China," the names chosen included Napoleon, Whiskey, Virus, and Bob Shop. The literate list of "Least Onomatopoetic Verbs" includes Profiteer, Cavort, Hyperextend, Expectorate, and Calcify. People concerned with personal image may find the list "Errors in Communication Between My Hairdresser and Me in the Form of What I Said and What He Heard" useful. Heed these valuable examples: "Said: Just a little off the length, and a little thinned out? Heard: Could you make me look like a clown's apprentice?"; "Said: A little shorter, thanks. Heard: I want the style that would emerge if you combined all three of Charlie's Angels." For the music fan, the list "Comments Overheard at a Brainstorming Meeting Between Ted Nugent and the Editors of 'Gourmet' Magazine Where They Were Discussing The Upcoming Book 'Gourmet Magazine's Vegan Cooking With Ted Nugent'" will prove enlightening. One overheard comment was "That's where you're wrong, chief. Plenty of people eat badger." Insightful. Expectant parents should especially note "Things You Don't Expect to See on a Baby Shower Announcement," to wit: Clothing optional, Baby Wendy Carlyle 19 inches, 84 pounds, Don't forget your towel, The more sausage the better, Seahawks game to follow, or Theme: Dirt Bikes. For the unemployed philosophy majors, the most useful list is doubtlessly "Few People Know That Martin Heidegger Who Created a Philosophy From Man's Terrifying Inability to Comprehend the Essence of His Own Being, Also Produced These Loving Works in Decoupage." Some of the works of artistic genius listed include: "Small kitten entangled in, and perplexed by, unspooled ball of yarn," and, of course, "Hausfrau triumphantly whisking fresh-baked muffins from glowing oven (beaming son in background)." For the avant garde musicologist, the list "Professional Wrestler? Or Song By Captain Beefheart?" is a difficult quiz. (I knew the answers without the list, of course, but include it here as an example of the enlightenment this book can produce.) 25th Century Quaker, Abba Zabba, Amish Roadkill, Big Eyed Beans, and Dirty Blue Gene. This exposes the one factual error I noticed in the book, and at the risk of giving away one of the answers, the actual name of the song is "Big Eyed Beans From Venus." It pays to be exact about such things. Finally on page 215 the book provides the most useful of all the lists, "Methods Other Than Song By Which One Can Be Killed Softly." Some of the eye opening entries ar
A great book for fans of The Onion
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 16 years ago
Fantastically dry humor rife with bitter, sarcastic social commentary. PEOPLE WHO WILL BE DISAPPOINTED WITH "MOUNTAIN MAN DANCE MOVES:" 1. The blind 2. Anyone who possess a phobia of unicorns 3. Anyone looking for a quality work of fiction about a break-dancing mountain man super-hero and his magical sidekick unicorn 4. Communists
If you like this sort of thing, you'll love this
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 16 years ago
The lists in Mountain Man Dance Moves are like a joke that's gone off on a weird tangent and you and everyone else are dying laughing but no one can begin to explain why when a confused newcomer saunters up and asks, "What's so funny?" This is absurd, hilarious, random, inane, stealthily intelligent and often brilliant comedy writing. I'm buying a stack of these to give to friends for their birthdays.
I actually peed a little.
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 17 years ago
This book had me laughing so hard I actually peed a little. Snot also came out of my nose.
Even the Premises Alone Are Funnier than Most Humor Books
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 18 years ago
More laughs-to-word ratio than almost any other book out there. Save it and savor it - don't read it too fast. Ideal convalescent fare as I discovered for myself.
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