At last, a book of sage advice that will help frustrated parents reconnect with their teenager and keep that connection even in today's often-crazy world.The first step is simple: realizing that inside every teen resides two very different people-the regressed child and the emergent adult. The emergent adult is seen at school, on the playing field, in his first job, and in front of his friends' families. Unfortunately, his parents usually see only the regressed child-moody and defiant-and, if they're not on the lookout, they'll miss seeing the more agreeable, increasingly adult thinker in their midst.With ingenious strategies for coaxing the more attractive of the two teen personalities into the home, family psychologist Mike Riera gives new hope to beleaguered and harried parents. From moving from a "managing" to a "consulting" role in a teen's life, from working with a teen's uniquely exasperating sleep rhythms to having real conversations when only monosyllables have been previously possible, Staying Connected to Your Teenager demonstrates ways to bring out the best in a teen-and, consequently, in an entire family.
Anyone with a teenager(s)in the house should do whatever is neccessary to make the time to read this book! I am only a few pages from finishing this book and this is as close to an "OWNER'S MANUAL" about teenagers as you're going to get. It will help you to better understand what's going on inside your amazing teen and enable you to help him/her through a most awkward (not to mention dangerous) stage of life. I wouldn't make your teen aware that you're reading this though, because there's alot of great info that a parent needs to know but may not want the teen to know that you know, if you know what I mean. And if you remember being a teen and think that will help you dealing with your teen, guess again. The problem is that when we were teens we didn't know the reasons for all the things that went on in our bodies as well as our lives. This book makes it all crystal clear, and understanding is the key to safety and harmony for you and your teen. If you love them and would like to regain your sanity read this book ASAP!
A must for parents of teenagers
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 17 years ago
I just finished this and passed it on to my husband to read (after highlighting many sections that apply specifically to our relationship with our 15 year old daughter). I learned so many things from this book - about myself AND my daughter. One of the most helpful discoveries was realizing that she actually is a normal and fairly typical teenager and, much to my relief, is not in need of an exorcism. I've seen a difference already in our ability to communicate effectively with each other and I'll refer to this book again and again ... especially with our son's teenage years just around the corner.
Invaluable Insight
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 17 years ago
This is by far the best book I have EVER read regarding my relationship with my two teenagers! One of the most revealing things to hit me was the concept of transitioning from a "Manager" to a "Consultant" in your relationship with your teen...how profoundly helpful. No other book has helped me on so many levels in my relations with my children. I am divorced father and have an ex who didn't care to co-parent because she was sure that she knew everything about raising kids that I didn't. That may have rung true to an extent until they became teenagers. As a result of putting into practice what I learned in this book, my son and daughter told me of their partying habits and that of their friends, in addition to other confidentialities. They confided in me that they told me things they wouldn't dare tell their mother. A couple of times they got drunk and called me because they knew that I would deal with them differently than their mother...all because of what I learned from this insightful book. I have had a very satisfying relationship with them both in terms of communication and openness, which has enriched my life to no end, and I believe theirs as well. My son called me from college one night several years later and thanked me for our relationship...which almost brought me to tears. We remain as close as we became when he was a teen. My teenage daughter and I have a great relationship as well. I have recommended this book to many of my friends who have teenagers. This should be REQUIRED reading for parents of teenagers! You really HAVE to read this book to effectively understand and be able to interact with your teen(s). I read this over several times and had sections marked as references to keep it fresh.
Fantastic book
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 17 years ago
My daughter is just about to turn 14. She is a great kid but in the last 6 months I had really had a harder and harder time talking to her. I found I lost my temper on a regular basis when she didn't do what I wanted or act like I wanted...I am about 75% through the book and I can honestly say it has helped me tremendously. I no longer get mad, I understand much better how to deal with her and that its not me. I have been able to apply some of the techniques decribed in the book and they work. Highly recommend to anyone who has teenagers.
Mike Riera is a the best in his field
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 21 years ago
Mike Riera writes about teens in a way that demonstrates his incredible respect for them. He helps us to take teens seriously, and not to dismiss their behavior as simply "dramatic" or "a stage." He is truly gifted, as a writer and a professional working with teens and families. He is thoughtful, real, and accessible to parents and to teens. I use his work everyday to inform my own work with teens, and his books are an incredible resource to offer to parents.
ThriftBooks sells millions of used books at the lowest everyday prices. We personally assess every book's quality and offer rare, out-of-print treasures. We deliver the joy of reading in recyclable packaging with free standard shipping on US orders over $15. ThriftBooks.com. Read more. Spend less.