In his extraordinary new book, Terrence Real, distinguished therapist and bestselling author, presents a long overdue message that women need to hear: You aren't crazy-you're right Women have changed in the last twenty-five years-they have become powerful, independent, self-confident, and happy. Yet many men remain irresponsible and emotionally detached. They don't know how to respond to frustrated partners who just want their mates to show up and grow up. Enter the good news: In this revolutionary book, Real shows women how to master the new rules of twenty-first-century marriage by offering them a set of effective tools with which they can create the truly intimate relationship that they desire and deserve. He identifies five non-starters to avoid and shares practical strategies for bringing honesty, passion, and joy back to even the most difficult relationship. Using his experience helping thousands of couples shift from despair to profound emotional closeness, Real guides you through the process of relationship repair with exercises that you can do alone or with your partner. With this program you'll discover how to - identify and articulate your wants and needs - listen well and respond generously - set limits, and stand up for yourself - embrace and appreciate what you have - know when to seek outside help The New Rules of Marriage will introduce you to a radically new kind of relationship, one based on the idea that every woman has the power to transform her marriage, while men, given the right support, have it in them to rise to the occasion. We have never wanted so much from our relationships as we do today. More than any other generation, we yearn for our mates to be lifelong friends and lovers. The New Rules of Marriage shows us how to fulfill this courageous and uncompromising new vision.
A Must Read, Whether in a Good or Poor or Future Relationship!
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 17 years ago
This is the BEST relationship book that I would recommend people read no matter if you are in a good, solid relationship and want to keep it that way, in a rocky relationship that you'd like to improve, or just thinking about someday being in a relationship. In fact, it is excellent even for those who are not going to be married - just socially interacting with other human beings!! Written by Terrence Real (a family therapist, who also specializes in male depression) this book certainly makes MY FRIENDS MUST READ list. Chapters are divided and activities arranged in such a way that individuals can work thru the book on their own (and see true positive changes in their relationships - with partners or friends) OR you can work thru it as a couple in addition to individual work. Real does makes some inaccurate statements about feminism and the feminist movements in our country, but I guess no book can be perfect and not everyone has background education in Women's Studies. :)
Every Couple's Read
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 17 years ago
If you are serious about your relationship, and both interested in learning your limitations, this is an exceptional resource. The author describes the difference between men (who retreat into their caves to avoid intimacy and work on problems) and women (who retreat into anger to avoid problems and end up limiting initimacy). Becoming self aware is an essential aspect of operating in the world, if we are willing to be honest about our behaviors we can become more functional. I also listened to the Audio version of the book and it was much more informative to hear the examples and conversations in this format. Having a tendency to drift when I read such examples, hearing them was better. The behaviors identified, practices provided, and exercises are well worth the effort. We don't expect ourselves to be trained in our occupations, why is it we expect that we will be perfectly skilled to succeed in relationship? It takes learning, and enough esteem to realize we don't know everything about making it work. This is a great start to intimate health.
RIGHT ON THE MONEY
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 17 years ago
Terrence Real hits the nail right on the head! I've been trying to bring my husband into the 21st century and therefore had been focusing solely on his problems. The New Rules Of Marriage opened my eyes to the things both of us need to learn and practice in order to get out of our old way of dealing with conflict and to be able to move on to the next level. This book is fantastic.
Marriage saving book...
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 17 years ago
Many of us come into life without any tools in our toolbox. Why? Our parents had very few tools to pass on to us. This book is full of tools and ways to keep your relationship honest and alive. I have read all of the author's other books and this one is just as good. I keep them all around for reference when I haven't loaned them out to a friend in need. Highly recommended read...
THE Relationship and Marriage Book to Get
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 18 years ago
This is not just another self-help book that will give you more tips and good ideas that you won't be able to implement. This is the book that will take you right to the core of what creates struggle in marriages and relationships, and help you fix yours step by step. The work this book lays out is not easy, but will lead you to happy relationship, as I can personally attest. I am making this book required reading for all my clients and am planning to use it as workbook to help them put their relationships and marriages back on the right track. Get it, study it and you will see what I mean.
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