The Normal Chaos of Love

This book investigates in what ways have phenomena like love, intimate relationship, family etc. changed from traditional, industrial or even feudal societies comparing to nowadays (post)modern world. The main thesis of the book is that the individualisation (individuation) - the freeing, emancipation, liberation - of man, which basically means the break up of traditional primary human ties like: bond with nature, God, class, gender, familiy...; led to the simultaneous and paradoxical situation where love (towards partner or child) is ever more wanted and longed for (becouse all other tradicional ties have ceased to exist, and so all the human "need to belong" is redirected towards the intimate love relationship), and on the other hand love is harder and harder to achieve (becouse the individualisation led to the situation where Self is the main center of everything, and where nobody is willing to make compromises, that would mean neglecting the need for self-realisation - compromises which are necessary in intimate relationships). The idea is very interesting and compellingly presented. On times the author is a bit poetic and philosophic, but all in all it is not a hard book to understand. What is its biggest weakness, in my opinion, is that it is quite repetitive. In the first two chapters the author pretty much tells you everything the book is trying to tell, and than this main idea is repeated in other variations throughout the book. To sum up, i do recommend this book, its idea is very interesting and it is compelling to read, it is sociologically revealing and even important, but it gets repetitive.