Tug of War: A Judge's Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles, and the Bitter Realities of Family Court

Tug of War is a must read for parents entering the sad and unpredictable phase of life you never thought would be your reality...divorce and child custody issues. We don't enter parenthood thinking that one day we will have to make custody decisions regarding our children. Mr. Justice Harvey Brownstone approaches the subject with great knowledge and real life experiences he witnesses each day in his courtroom. Each aspect of this procedure is explained in detail and most importantly, in easy to understand text. The author pays careful attention to the fact that people from all walks of life may be turning to his book for guidance. It certainly provides much food for thought and hopefully alternatives for parents in this situation. The bottom line...it's not about you, it's about your children. Some examples of events that have occurred in Justice Brownstone's courtroom are chilling when you remember these are innocent children's lives being discussed. As an educator, I have witnessed all too often, parents who can't separate their issues and their children's education issues at a parent conference. Too many times I've had to referee "the games" parents play when it comes to their children. I only wish I had copies of "Tug of War" to give them as their "homework assignment"! This is a book that should become part of every university's curriculum, especially in courses focusing on family and education careers. I personally have given copies to people I know who are in this precarious situation. Thank you Mr. Justice Harvey Brownstone for tackling this most important and current subject.

This book is so unique (the first written by a sitting judge) and readable that I finished it in one sitting. It's written for the general public and speaks primarily to people who need to resolve issues relating to custody and support of their children. The judge makes a plea to parents to use the family court as a last resort and explains alternatives to litigation, like mediation. He also provides a thorough explanation of how the family courts and laws operate, including how they intersect with the criminal justice system. But, the book really shines when the judge shares what he has seen in his courtroom during his 14 year career on the bench. Using real life anecdotes, sprinkled with empathy and humor, Judge Brownstone teaches us all about the impacts of separation and divorce on children. Read this book to educate yourself and give it to someone you know who could benefit from Judge Brownstone's insight.