Why Can't I Ever Be Good Enough?

I loved the book and am still reading it! It has been very helpful for me to heal the dysfunctional & erroneous beliefs about myself that I picked up during my childhood with my parents. I liked the part about finding contracts that I subconsciously made with life that were destructive to me.

In Why Can't I Ever Be Good Enough, Joan Rubin-Deutsch soothes, encourages and inspires you to make changes in your life. She clearly wants her readers to be happier and live more joyful and authentic lives.Through gentle language, sharing stories about her clients and herself, guided meditations and easy-to-follow exercises, readers are guided along a healing journey with Joan as their emotional tour guide.This book would be helpful for anyone interested in understanding themselves more. Joan's found a new and very interesting way to describe how and why we got trapped in maladaptive patterns. In her description and discussion of the contracts we made as children, we learn that we have the power to change - to transform old destructive messages about ourselves into messages that are clear and objective - messages that offer greater choices and freedom.From changing the inner voices to reflect your "true inner self" to "becoming your own internal architect", Joan will walk the path with you as you decide which life contracts to keep, which to modify and which to discard completely. You will be a freer person at the end of your journey.

This is a truly amazing and wonderful book! Rubin-Deutsch writes that "you can be the person YOU choose to be . . ." and offers a step-by-step guide to discovery and realization. She makes it easy to grasp the often unconscious patterns we form as children in response to our parents and families by using the idea of contracts-and then shows how to "re-write" these contracts from a healthy and adult point of view. The book contains clear explanations of the concepts, with examples, and is also a workbook with exercises to complete. It is definitely not something to rush through, but requires some serious thought in order to really achieve personal growth. The book is very well organized and each chapter builds upon the work in the previous chapter so that you can really see and feel progress. I especially liked the guided meditations which are used as a tool for relaxation, coping, discovery and reinforcement--and continue to use them. Reading this book and doing the work felt very much like working with a therapist-it almost seemed like I could hear her! She must be fantastic to work with in person! Anyone who wants to unhook themselves from the damaging thoughts, feelings and behaviors that stem from childhood "contracts" will appreciate the supportive, affirming and positive voice of the author. But I also think that just about everyone can benefit from the self-exploration that flows from the exercises Rubin-Deutsch outlines.