Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes: A No-Bullshit Guide to World Mythology
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Book Overview
From the creator of Myths Retold comes a hilarious collection of Greek, Norse, Chinese and even Sumerian myths retold in their purest, bawdiest forms All our lives, we've been fed watered-down, PC versions of the classic myths. In reality, mythology is more screwed up than a schizophrenic shaman doing hits of unidentified...wait, it all makes sense now. In Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, Cory O'Brien, creator of Myths RETOLD , sets the stories straight. These are rude, crude, totally sacred texts told the way they were meant to be told: loudly, and with lots of four-letter words. Did you know? - Cronus liked to eat babies.
- Narcissus probably should have just learned to masturbate.
- Odin got construction discounts with bestiality.
- Isis had bad taste in jewelry.
- Ganesh was the very definition of an unplanned pregnancy.
- And Abraham was totally cool about stabbing his kid in the face. Still skeptical? Here are a few more gems to consider: - Zeus once stuffed an unborn fetus inside his thigh to save its life after he exploded its mother by being too good in bed.
- The entire Egyptian universe was saved because Sekhmet just got too hammered to keep murdering everyone.
- The Hindu universe is run by a married couple who only stop murdering in order to throw sweet dance parties...on the corpses of their enemies.
- The Norse goddess Freyja once consented to a four-dwarf gangbang in exchange for one shiny necklace. And there's more dysfunctional goodness where that came from
- Narcissus probably should have just learned to masturbate.
- Odin got construction discounts with bestiality.
- Isis had bad taste in jewelry.
- Ganesh was the very definition of an unplanned pregnancy.
- And Abraham was totally cool about stabbing his kid in the face. Still skeptical? Here are a few more gems to consider: - Zeus once stuffed an unborn fetus inside his thigh to save its life after he exploded its mother by being too good in bed.
- The entire Egyptian universe was saved because Sekhmet just got too hammered to keep murdering everyone.
- The Hindu universe is run by a married couple who only stop murdering in order to throw sweet dance parties...on the corpses of their enemies.
- The Norse goddess Freyja once consented to a four-dwarf gangbang in exchange for one shiny necklace. And there's more dysfunctional goodness where that came from
Format:Paperback
Language:English
ISBN:039916040X
ISBN13:9780399160400
Release Date:March 2013
Publisher:Tarcherperigee
Length:304 Pages
Weight:0.56 lbs.
Dimensions:0.7" x 4.4" x 7.9"
Age Range:18 years and up
Grade Range:Postsecondary and higher
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